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Friday, July 16, 2010
Sex & Aging
Having a positive attitude...
We are all victims of the harmful attitudes towards older people in our society. As we age, we will have to deal with the preconceptions which now exist. Now is the time to address harmful stereotypes and insure that elderly people in the future do not have to live with the prejudices that affect them today.
Societal attitudes toward sexuality in later life are troubling. A great number believe that far fewer mature men and women have sex than actually do. Many feel that after a certain age, sexuality becomes an insignificant or indifferent part of life. Nothing could be farther from the truth. Most older people experience some interest in sexual intimacy. Many people are sexually intimate well into their 80s and beyond. We do not all of a sudden become asexual beings; our capacity for sexual intimacy will be with us our entire lives. The real differences that exist lie in the way sexuality is expressed. Most anything can be a turn-on at 20, but at 60, after years of sexual experience, expressions of sexuality are more refined, more evolved. The act can be at this time can be a masterwork after years study.
What is the purpose of sex in later life?
As we all approach later life, two of the things which brought us the greatest joy - our children and/or our careers - are no longer as prevalent in our every day. This means that our personal relationships take on an increased importance. It is a way of solidifying our relationship with our partner and taking refuge from the sometimes harsh reality of the world. Sex is a way to affirm the love of life. It is an expression of the satisfaction gained from the present. It expresses the closeness of our deepest relationships and is an important measure of the quality of life.
We are all victims of the harmful attitudes towards older people in our society. As we age, we will have to deal with the preconceptions which now exist. Now is the time to address harmful stereotypes and insure that elderly people in the future do not have to live with the prejudices that affect them today.
Societal attitudes toward sexuality in later life are troubling. A great number believe that far fewer mature men and women have sex than actually do. Many feel that after a certain age, sexuality becomes an insignificant or indifferent part of life. Nothing could be farther from the truth. Most older people experience some interest in sexual intimacy. Many people are sexually intimate well into their 80s and beyond. We do not all of a sudden become asexual beings; our capacity for sexual intimacy will be with us our entire lives. The real differences that exist lie in the way sexuality is expressed. Most anything can be a turn-on at 20, but at 60, after years of sexual experience, expressions of sexuality are more refined, more evolved. The act can be at this time can be a masterwork after years study.
What is the purpose of sex in later life?
As we all approach later life, two of the things which brought us the greatest joy - our children and/or our careers - are no longer as prevalent in our every day. This means that our personal relationships take on an increased importance. It is a way of solidifying our relationship with our partner and taking refuge from the sometimes harsh reality of the world. Sex is a way to affirm the love of life. It is an expression of the satisfaction gained from the present. It expresses the closeness of our deepest relationships and is an important measure of the quality of life.
Masturbation
More and more women these days are openly advocating the use of vibrators during masturbation to heighten levels of pleasure.
The external female genitals are called the vulva. Pubic hair grows on the labia majora or outer vaginal lips; inside are the labia minora, which are pinker and moister. If your own genitals are not familiar to you, you might examine them in a hand mirror while bathing or showering. The clitoris is found where the labia minora join at the top. This highly sensitive pink knob is about the size of a pea and is protected by a hood, which retracts during sexual arousal. Below the clitoris is the tiny opening of the urethra, through which urine passes, and below that is the opening to the vagina.
Masturbation is best when you have plenty of time and when you won't be interrupted. Go somewhere private, quiet and warm. Beyond that, it's completely up to you: some women like to lie on their back, some on their front; some like their legs pressed tightly together, while others like them spread wide apart or propped above the body. Using a lubricant can help while you explore with your fingers or an object such as a vibrator. Experimentation is the key.
If masturbation is the key form of enjoyment for you, then Have Fun
The external female genitals are called the vulva. Pubic hair grows on the labia majora or outer vaginal lips; inside are the labia minora, which are pinker and moister. If your own genitals are not familiar to you, you might examine them in a hand mirror while bathing or showering. The clitoris is found where the labia minora join at the top. This highly sensitive pink knob is about the size of a pea and is protected by a hood, which retracts during sexual arousal. Below the clitoris is the tiny opening of the urethra, through which urine passes, and below that is the opening to the vagina.
Masturbation is best when you have plenty of time and when you won't be interrupted. Go somewhere private, quiet and warm. Beyond that, it's completely up to you: some women like to lie on their back, some on their front; some like their legs pressed tightly together, while others like them spread wide apart or propped above the body. Using a lubricant can help while you explore with your fingers or an object such as a vibrator. Experimentation is the key.
If masturbation is the key form of enjoyment for you, then Have Fun
Safe Sex
Sex safety doesn't end with condoms...
Safer sex does not just entail wearing a condom, but also includes keeping clean, knowing what to avoid and making the right decisions.
Keeping clean
Practicing safer sex is indeed much more involved than simply wearing a condom. Couples must be conscious of the potential dangers and avoid engaging in risky behavior.
There are a number of fluids involved in sex - urine, feces, semen, vaginal secretions, saliva, and blood - fluids with which either partner can come into contact through the course of virtually any form of sexual activity. Many of these fluids are excellent carriers of disease, and should be handled with care.
* Never have vaginal sex after anal sex without washing first. The feces carry many organisms that can infect the vagina, and can be transferred by a penis, dildo, mouth or finger like a bee transfers pollen. Wash well or use a different condom to make sure you don't cause infection.
* Never share condoms, dildos or sex toys. A condom should only ever be used once. If you do plan to use a sex toy or dildo that was used by someone else, remember to wash it well with soap and water. If you are really unsure, you can even use bleach to clean these items, and rinse them extremely well, or put a condom over the object.
* Always wash well before anal play. Anal play is safer if you wash the anus and surrounding area with soap and water beforehand. It is also recommended that you defecate (have a bowel movement) well before you begin.
* Always wash towels and bedsheets. Some STDs (such as scabies) can be transmitted through fabric. Never reuse towels used to wash up after sex as a hand or face towel; just throw any towels straight into the laundry, or use bathroom tissue.
Safer sex does not just entail wearing a condom, but also includes keeping clean, knowing what to avoid and making the right decisions.
Keeping clean
Practicing safer sex is indeed much more involved than simply wearing a condom. Couples must be conscious of the potential dangers and avoid engaging in risky behavior.
There are a number of fluids involved in sex - urine, feces, semen, vaginal secretions, saliva, and blood - fluids with which either partner can come into contact through the course of virtually any form of sexual activity. Many of these fluids are excellent carriers of disease, and should be handled with care.
* Never have vaginal sex after anal sex without washing first. The feces carry many organisms that can infect the vagina, and can be transferred by a penis, dildo, mouth or finger like a bee transfers pollen. Wash well or use a different condom to make sure you don't cause infection.
* Never share condoms, dildos or sex toys. A condom should only ever be used once. If you do plan to use a sex toy or dildo that was used by someone else, remember to wash it well with soap and water. If you are really unsure, you can even use bleach to clean these items, and rinse them extremely well, or put a condom over the object.
* Always wash well before anal play. Anal play is safer if you wash the anus and surrounding area with soap and water beforehand. It is also recommended that you defecate (have a bowel movement) well before you begin.
* Always wash towels and bedsheets. Some STDs (such as scabies) can be transmitted through fabric. Never reuse towels used to wash up after sex as a hand or face towel; just throw any towels straight into the laundry, or use bathroom tissue.
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